I Know How the Republicans Are Going To Win This Election

Usually when I do not have any comments to add to a link, a photo, or a video, I just post it on my Tumblelog, but the following video is too important to be missed and is just so very articulate that I dare not add one word of commentary. This is MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann’s special comment on Hillary Clinton, in regards to Geraldine Ferraro:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtAja20kTCA

Monopoly Game Manufacturer to End a Century Old Conflict

A month ago, I updated my readers on Hasbro’s worldwide vote to find the 22 greatest cities for the new world edition of the Monopoly board game. On my post titled ‘Up and Answer, Jewish Yeoman – Vote It Joyfully Aloud!‘ I jokingly called upon every right-wing nutter to defend Jerusalem, ‘eternal capital city of the Jewish people’, by voting for it on the Monopoly website.

Well, it turns out the joke was on me and my people:
Hasbro decided that the quickest way to end the Arab-Israeli conflict is to change the status of Jerusalem from the capital of Israel to an undefined territory, belonging to no man or nation. Although I probably should have foreseen that old shtick making a comeback, I did not – and so you will have to believe my word that the first version of the website listed ‘Jerusalem, Israel’ in one of the rankings.
Following are screenshots of the second and third versions:

[singlepic id=27 w=450 h=500 float=center]

As you can clearly see, on the second version every world city is naturally located within a country, except for Jerusalem. Smart way to end the conflict, right?
After the Israeli Embassy protested Hasbro’s doing (no, I am not kidding), the company decided to put on their smarty-pants and remove all the countries. Yes folks, just like every fourth Eurovision Song Contest and every second Olympic Games event, someone always wants to show preemptive kindness on the official website, so that the people who tend to get mad – won’t. Even as we speak, Hasbro is removing additional connections between cities of the world and their corresponding countries:
Can you find which words are missing from one of these four Monopoly city guides? (yellow highlight mine)

[singlepic id=23 w=235 h=500 float=center] [singlepic id=25 w=235 h=500 float=center]
[singlepic id=26 w=235 h=500 float=center] [singlepic id=24 w=235 h=500 float=center]

Academy Award Nominations Concur: America is at a Crossroads

With all the excitement of an Israeli film nominated for an Academy Award for the first time in twenty years, I did not pay enough attention to the Documentary Feature category:
Three out of five films nominated deal directly with the Iraqi conflict, including ‘No End in Sight‘, which I wrote about in a post titled ‘Watch This Film and Become a Better Citizen of the World in 90 Minutes‘. If you were not persuaded to follow my advice then, with an Oscar nomination you really have no excuse now.

Watch the No End in Sight trailer here:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGPp-WhgEXE

The 80th Academy Awards telecast, hosted by Jon Stewart (Leibowitz), will be broadcasted live:
USA – February 24th, 5PT/8ET, ABC
Israel – February 25th, 3am, Hot Gold (channel 12)

Hebrew Obama Poster: CHANGE WE CAN BELIEVE IN

Inspired by Will.i.am’s video and the Yes We Ken Girl, as well as being moved daily by Obama’s rhetoric and promise of a better America and vicariously a better world, I thought I would do my part: Following is an Obama poster I translated to Hebrew. It is my first creation for the campaign, and I am thinking about making a Hebrew video as well. We’ll see…

[singlepic id=18 w=450 h=693 float=center]

Click here to download a Zip file containing a print-size JPG and PSD.

Disclaimer:
– Use the graphics in any way you see fit, as long as it is not for financial gain, and as long as it gets Obama elected.
– You can use CafePress, Zazzle, or similar online printing services to print merchandize for you and your friends, as long as you do not set up a public shop.
– If you have used the graphics online or printed it and held it in an Obama rally, it would be nice if you could send some photos and share the joy.
– Feel free to link directly to the original post on my blog, but do not link directly to the files.

Make sure you check out my other design:
Hebrew Obama Poster: YES OUI KEN | frgdr.com

I will elaborate a bit on my artistic decisions: Translating ‘change we can believe in’ proved to be somewhat of a challenge, as the Hebrew word for ‘we can’ (NUCHAL, נוכל) is the exact one for ‘crook’ (NOCHEL, נוכל). In this age of Rovean politics, even a hint of such subliminal connections can be bad – remember the 2000 Democrats/rats ad by the Bush campaign? For that reason I chose wording which loosely translates to ‘change that can be believed in’, which has the added benefit of being misread as something like ‘Change, you can believe in him’. Since Hebrew uses a different Alphabet altogether, I could not use the original fonts. These are the closest I could find:

The original English PDF was downloaded from here, now here.

Update: This post was originally titled ‘We Need a Mentch in the White House‘, but was renamed upon releasing my second Hebrew Obama poster.

A True Israeli Does Not Evade the Real Issues

Instead of discussing the issues that lead to the ongoing decrease in army enrollment, the powers that be have decided to embark on a campaign that aims to shame Israelis that did not enlist, and emphasize the superficial shared experiences that connect Israelis who did serve.
Having served in the IDF myself, I think I earned the right to say I find this campaign to be quasi-fascist on one hand and super-shallow on the other – an all out war on secular middle-class Israelis.
Only in a newborn democracy would the government dare to attack a portion of its citizens without ever opening the subject for real debate: in the commercials you would not find a single governmentally-exempt Orthodox Jew, nor a single sexually-harassed female soldier, nor a single MoD-ignored PTSD veteran.

Here is one of the TV spots of this campaign:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R0_M-2WO7pI

Here is a spoof ad that was recently released by a group of brave Israelis (with less than brave acting skills) in an effort to open the subject for debate:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwTebMJtJPI

Hat tip to Mizbala.

Obama Wins* Super-Tuesday – or – Who Would Jew Vote For?

We all know Jews control the media. Yes, ever since our secret protocols were revealed the entire world knows our real intensions. Today as I watched will.i.am’s inspirational Yes We Can song in support of Presidential candidate Barack Obama, I could not help noticing how deep our control of the media goes, as one of our spies was able to insert a subliminal message in our secret Hebrew language.

Watch the clip, and roll to minute marks 1:09 and 1:44:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjXyqcx-mYY
[singlepic id=12 w=320 h=200 float=right]Now you know how Obama won*: our very own Israeli-born Mossad agent/part-time model/struggling actress Maya Rubin       was able to infiltrate the editing studio where the video was made, and inserted a message to all our sleeper agents in our encrypted holy tongue: ‘Ken, Anu Yeholim‘ which loosely translates to ‘Yes, We Can’. Those of you in the know remember that this is the same message that notified American Zionists not to go to work on that day in 2001.

* At the time of publishing this post the polls are still open, so obviously this is another Jewish scheme to lure people who Google the subject.
Any reference to Jewish schemes, Zionists plots, acts of espionage and the general conspiratorial undertone in this post should be taken as mere satire by anyone reading this.
Except for Jews, which are ordered to take this post literally by the General HQ.

Which Presidential Candidate Should I Vote For On Super-Tuesday?

Good Morning!

If you happen to be one of the few who will have a chance to determine the future of the world (yes, the world – see Dubya’s legacy for reference), but you just happened to sleep through the debates and you are not really sure where the candidates stand on issues that concern you, here is a solution for you:
GlassBooth.org is a website that will help you decide who to vote for. All you have to do is select which hot button issues concern you, and how much you care about it, and the website will tell you which candidate shares your beliefs, based on past votes and campaign speeches.

What Presidential Candidate Should I Vote For On Super-Tuesday?The issues you can choose from are:
– Medical Marijuana and Drug Policy
– Civil Liberties and Domestic Security
– Crime and Punishment
– Iraq and Foreign Policy
– Trade and Economics
– Environment and Energy
– Gun Control
– Immigration
– Health Care
– Social Security
– Taxes and Budget
– Education
– Gay Rights
– Abortion and Birth Control

Have a productive Super-Tuesday,
Vote early and often!

Israel Losing Its Marbles Trying To Make the Holocaust Cool Enough For Kids

Today is International Holocaust Remembrance Day and Israeli Minister of Education Yuli Tamir, scraping the bottom of the making-the-Holocaust-cool-enough-for-our-apathetic-kids barrel, has declared a national project in which high school students will compete to gather the most glass marbles, in an effort to collect 1.5 million marbles, one for each Jewish child perished in the Holocaust.

Paper Clips is a 2004 award-winning documentary about middle school children from the city of Whitwell, Tennessee who tried to collect 6 million paper clips to commemorate the estimated number of Jews who lost their lives by the Nazis.
A young aid probably handed the minister a copy of the movie and she must have thought that this idea is, like, totally cool and stuff – and decided to create her own governmentally funded spin-off project.

I have watched the movie last year and thought it was very moving, so how can I be against a similar project this year? Am I just pro paper clips and anti marbles? Please watch the Paper Clips film trailer now before reading the rest of this post:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GP15cY3f7UA

Okay, now let us examine the differences:
The rural community of Whitwell has a population of less than 2000 residents, all of them white, all of them Christians.
A middle school history class about the Holocaust made the children aware of the fact that they have never met a Jewish person, nor can grasp the notion of six million people.
The children started writing letters to some people, explaining their project and asking them to kindly send one paper clip.
The project continued for a number of years.
Without giving too much away I will just say that this simple idea started a chain of events and made a difference in the lives of the students, the school and the city.
As a Jewish person, I have found the movie to be inspirational, as it documented contemporary kids who were not obsessed with pop culture and shopping, who were not apathetic when taught about events that happened half a century ago in a country they have never visited to a people they have never met.
That is why I did not linger over the gut feeling that linking paper clips and people is a bit simplistic and might be considered in bad taste by some people.

Now let’s get back to Tamir’s idea:
The esteemed minister initiated a government initiative in which school children from all over Israel will compete with other schools, to see who collects the most marbles.
Most of the children will most likely buy the marbles, to increase their chances of winning.
The project will probably be time-restricted, to make sure the attention-deficit youngsters will not lose interest.

These children will not be encouraged to meet a Holocaust survivor and learn about his ordeals.
These children will not be encouraged to investigate how many of their own relatives perished in the Holocaust.
These children will not be encouraged to learn about recent incidents of genocide.
These children will not be encouraged to investigate xenophobia in their own environment.

Oh no, these children are encouraged in a government funded project to collect marbles, in an effort to quantify the suffering and prove once and for all that our Holocaust was bigger and better than everyone else’s, and being in the Holocaust* was a total bummer.

I believe this is another clear sign the empire is sinking.

*Israeli children may often say ‘he was in the Holocaust’, subconsciously referring to the Holocaust as a physical place.

Up and Answer, Jewish Yeoman – Vote It Joyfully Aloud!

[singlepic id=2 w=320 h=240 float=right]Monopoly is the best selling board game in the world, sold in 103 countries and produced in 37 languages. Game manufacturer Parker Brothers has launched a worldwide vote to find the 22 greatest cities in the world to be included on the new MONOPOLY Here & Now: The World Edition game board. You can cast your vote online and make sure your favorite city will be included and maybe even placed on the highest rent property. I know many right-wing Israelis would take this as a chance to further the notion that Jerusalem is the ‘eternal capital city of the Jewish people’ – so I just wanted to give you the heads up.

Voting period ends February 28, 2008.

Hat tip to Albert C. Veldhuis from the Monopoly Lexicon.
 

Missing Them: Waiting for Ron, Gilad, Ehud and Eldad in Airports around the World

I am usually against armchair activism in all its forms, as I believe Israeli citizens should protest on the streets just like their French and Italian peers. With regards to the kidnapped Israeli soldiers, I have seen banners, online petitions and Facebook groups – each one trying to convince me that the boys will be brought home just as soon as one million members sign up.

MissingThem.netI feel different about this coming protest and that is why I am posting about it:
On Thursday, January 24, 2008, people who care enough to leave their houses are encouraged to participate in a grassroots activity that hopefully will grab some media coverage. Students from Emek Yizrael Academic College are asking people from all around the world to drive to their local airport and stand for a while in the arrivals hall, holding a blank A4 paper – with no name on it, as a symbol for the agonizing wait for the soldiers’ arrival. Protestors are encouraged to document themselves in photos and video, to be posted on the (now-defunct) project’s website www.missingthem.net

This act of performance art is intended to raise awareness within the regular meeters and greeters holding name signs of people arriving shortly, and by word of mouth raise awareness among people that will be told of the act later that day by the original bystanders. While the electronic media might cover this event, I am pretty certain the honest effort and true emotions will be filtered by the cold flickering TV screen.

Come if you can! Come if you care!