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Channel 10 is the youngest of Israel’s three broadcast channels. Established January 28th, 2002, it is just over 6 years old and still struggling to snatch viewers from the leading Channel 2.

Over the years I have noticed Channel 10 is much too absorbed in finding a magic logo, a magic tagline, a magic bullet to make it grab the big ratings, believing that in substance versus style, the latter wins. The logo in the corner of my television screen kept changing, or in Madison Avenue Newspeak: evolving. Disregarding the use of different colors, on and off shadows and the odd use of 3D, I counted four principle logos in 6 years – that’s one logo makeover every two years!

Except for the logos changing, note that in 2005 the channel changed its name from ‘Channel 10′ to ‘Israel 10′ – and back to ‘Channel 10′ in 2006.

In addition, Channel 10 had used five different ad agencies over the years, which translates to the advertising budget changing hands every 15 months:
2002: Gitam BBDO
2003: Reuveni Pridan
2006: Grey Interactive Israel (Adler Chomski & Warshavsky)
2007: Zarmon Goldman
2008: in house

How many years does Nike use the ‘Just do it’ tagline? Twenty? Oh, no, Channel 10 will have none of that… I have counted five different taglines the channel used over the years:
2002: The entire country is 10 (כל המדינה עשר)
2002: That’s what TV is for (בשביל זה יש טלויזיה)
2004: Everyone is already watching 10 (כולם כבר רואים 10)
2005: TV that speaks to you (טלויזיה שמדברת אליך)
2006: Changing the picture (משנה את התמונה)

What? You want more? I feel like I am one bad sweater away from a Mike Levey Amazing Discoveries infomercial… Okay, okay, last one:

In six years, Channel 10 had managed to use three different domains as its main website: israel10.tv, 10.tv and nana10.co.il

6 years, 4 logos, 2 name changes, 5 ad agencies, 5 taglines, 3 websites.
Consistency, thy name is Channel 10.

In the last couple of years it became common practice for Israeli newspapers to stuff themselves with supplements which look at first like genuine newspaper addition, but are actually just advertisements posing as articles. This is an effort, I assume, to give the inherit deceitful nature of advertising an air of objective news coverage.

There is one such monthly supplement about cell phone models, one about office equipment, and a few that feature an array of products, linking fashion trends with things you can purchase. A new supplement which fits the latter is titled: URBAN – GET A LIFE STYLE [sic].
When I first laid my hands on it I thought I was reading it wrong, as I myself often feel the uncontrollable urge to tell people searching for style to get a life – and so having the very source of evil inadvertently tell the same to its readers, thinking it is a clever play on words – well, that just brightened up my day.

I started flipping through the magazine and had to really fight my gag reflex. The pages were filled with pseudo-new-age mantras, one nauseating mantra before each of the magazine sections [emphasis and capitals theirs]: It’s not who you’re sleeping with BUT where in the lodging section, Food is like desire. It’s much better in a PRETTY package! in the dining section, It’s not who you’re talking to BUT what you’re talking with in the cell phones section, There are two ways to achieve HAPPINESS: Be in love or drink fine wine in the wine section, There’s electricity in the air GET IT! – yes, you guessed it - in the electrical appliances section.

And then I hit the mother lode in the accessories section:

You see, it is quite rare to be able to summarize a critique into a single sentence, much rarer to be able to summarize it to a single word – but to find one such word published by the very people the critique speaks against, well that is as close to force majeure as you can find.

Yes, excessories is exactly how I would spell the unnecessary daily purchases done by people trying to fill the void in their soul, and here it comes from the advertiser’s mouth. Oh! The humanity…

Epilogue:
When I first stumbled upon the website Engrish.com which meticulously documents the Japanese’s futile attempt at mastering the English language, I laughed so hard at ‘those stupid Japanese’. I assume this is exactly what non-Israelis do when they look at us, as we also show the same negative correlation between how cool the natives revere the English language and how poor their actual English-language skills are.

Rabbi Raphael Halperin, owner of Optica Halperin (and a former wrestler), announced yesterday that he is cancelling the tender for the company’s advertising account. This was the first time in 19 years the company called a pitch to run its three million dollars account, but after reviewing the bids Halperin decided to continue advertising on his own, buying media as an individual.

Halperin told Maariv newspaper that he did not like any of the ad agencies’ bids, as all of them focused on changing the company – not advertising it.

I applaud Rabbi Halperin as it must be difficult to watch the current advertising trends, and say with conviction: You are all crazy, and I must be the only sane person left. While he did not elaborate, I am willing to put my money where my keyboard is and suggest each of the bids received included at least one of the following overused superficial makeovers:

The Acronym Shtick:
In lieu of creative thinking let’s just acronym the company’s Hebrew name into English letters, just like with these companies:

Matim Li   >>   ML
HaMashbir Mahsaney Ofna   >>   H&O
Lilith & Varda   >>   L&V
Avigdor Shoes   >>   AVG

The Color Shtick:
They say if you can’t make it good, make it big – and if you can’t make it big, make it red. The following companies actually paid money for this advice:

Cellcom (telecom)   >>   Purple
Pelephone (telecom)   >>   Blue
Orange (telecom)   >>   Orange
Bezeq (telecom)   >>   Blue
Mirs (telecom)   >>   Green
Hapoalim (bank)   >>   Red
Discount (bank)   >>   Green
Leumi (bank)   >>   Blue

The Logo Shtick:
One of my favorite shticks, and the one that proves ad agencies basically create their own market by convincing companies to change their logo every couple of years.
Here is a visual timeline I created for a number of leading Israeli companies, one not-so-leading company that has never changed its logo, and one organization that was brave enough to revert to its vintage logo after two years of using a new-and-improved logo.
Please note this is a draft and some dates are mere estimates.

We all misspell, no doubt about it, even more so when using a language other than our mother tongue. But lately it seems there is an inverse relationship between the Israelis’ infatuation with the English language, and their actual interest in mastering it. It always dazzles me how companies spend piles of money on advertisements without spending a minute to check for spelling errors. Israeli food company Elite backs its snacks campaign with a website for kids, where they can start their own blog and get popularity votes for it. I can only speculate what is the effect of a kid typing daily www.tatoomania.co.il and then going off to the world wondering why everyone is spelling it with three T’s.

And don’t get me started on sticker tattoos for kids, kiddie blogs as pedophile hangouts, the unnecessary rating system on that website, or the fat contents in the snacks you need to buy to get the tattoo.